Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Things That Stick In My Craw - Worst Christmas Gifts Ever

What goes through people's minds when they shop for Christmas presents? Or regift? Do some of them even *think* of who they are selecting a present for?

My worst present ever was from my last husband. It was our first Christmas together. I was excited as I opened a good sized box. Inside was a. . .toaster.

I looked up at him confused. He told me I'd been complaining that every time we get a toaster, it died on us, so he got an expensive European one. His mom took him aside later to tell him that unless a woman specifically asks for a practical present, never, EVER give them one.

The next Christmas I got two beautiful sweaters, some shirts and other "girly" things. He learned his lesson.

I asked some friends what their worst Christmas gifts were. They follow. Send me your worst Christmas gift - I really want to know what it was!

Kevin - I used to be really heavy. One year my wife bought a bunch of size medium shirts. Depressing.

PJ - It's got to be the fruit in the stocking. I would leave them in the stocking and find them rotten eventually.

Nancy - My worst would be back when I was a size 3, my Mom in law would get me XHUGE shirts/clothes. Good times!!

Joan - When I was very, very young my godfather used to give me underwear every single Xmas-the kind with days of week on it!!! Think that was his wife's doing. They had eight kids so it must have been important to her!!! Who knows?

Kathryn - Hubby had this eccentric great aunt who used to re-gift boxes of cherry cordials, which I don't particularly like. Actually had to eat one right there, thought I'd gag it back up.

Jennifer - I got a USED chapstick from my cousin the Avon lady. From the same chick came a hand painted sign that said "WELOME TO OUR HOME" for years all we ever said was "welome" instead of "welcome". C's are so over-rated anyway.

Shari - My parents always used to get me exercise stuff...not because I asked but because they wanted me skinny...so much for unconditional acceptance. :(

Laurie - Oh boy! It wasn't me, it was my friend. She played her video taped at Christmas that year. She said I wouldn't believe it and she was right. Her husband bought her a sponge mop. (???) Then, he handed her another package she thought was the "real" present. Excited to get it open - only to see it was .... REFILLS? I saw this with my own eyes. He thought it was a great present.

Britt - One of those weird 18 month calendars. "But there's still 6 good months on it!"

Gretchen - The year my brother gave me a tshirt and a coffee mug. I looked for a present for him for WEEKS, and I was totally pissed off. What made it even worse was when I told my mom how mad I was, she started to cry, because SHE gave him that LAME ASS idea of a Christmas present.

Cass - The xmas I spent with my ex-fiance and his father and step-mom was probably worst possible gifts ever. His mom and step-dad did great... I still have the spice rack she gave me, I still wear the sweater she bought me, etc. But his dad and step-mom? I got a cheap candle holder, an exacto knife, a few sample sized toiletries and... um.... I think that was it. It was like they went through the dollar store and grabbed a bunch of random things. What else should I have expected from a guy who gave me his step-mom's ring as an engagement ring, since she passed it on to him to try to create a family "heirloom"? Hint: it is not a family heirloom if you're a step-parent and the ring was something you got from an ex-boyfriend 15 years before. Oh, and it was totally not my type of ring either... gold with a diamond cluster (I like silver and a solitary diamond).

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Things That Stick In My Craw - Spoilers

I don't get a chance to watch every TV show on the night it airs. I usually DVR it to watch later. Or read a book when it comes out. Or see a movie the first weekend it's at the theaters. So why do some people insist on spoiling it for others?

If you are watching the finale of a TV show, do NOT post updates on Facebook, Twitter, Myspace, etc while you are watching. I got up this morning to find people posted the ending of a popular TV show that I usually watch, but tape to watch later. Geez, thanks for spoiling it for me.

If you go to see a movie the first night it's at the theater, don't post pertinent plots points or the ending. And don't call me to tell me either. Please. Let me get the chance to see it myself.

If I don't watch a TV show/series that you think is totally awesome, don't basically call me an idiot for not watching it. My taste in what I watch may differ from yours. I just may think YOU are the idiot.

If you get a book the first day it appears in stores, read it that day/night, don't tell me the ending. Don't post about it online. Just don't do it!

And movie studios, what the hell are you thinking by putting plot points in the previews/trailers? Can't you give us just a hint without spoiling it for us? Why do you think people don't go to the movies much anymore? While I'm on that subject, why the hell are tickets so expensive? And the popcorn, soda and candy are MORE than the tickets. WTF?

If you are going to post online, please put in big letters SPOILERS AHEAD, then leave some blank lines, then post what you want. Give the rest of us a chance to pass by your post so that we can enjoy that TV show, movie or book on our own.